Living A Life Of No Regrets

For the longest time I have had the idea that I want to live a life of no regrets.

You know, when I'm old and grey, I don't want to look back on my life and think to myself, "I wish I would have done that differently."

But recently my living life of no regrets motto seemed to be turned upside-down with one simple thought. I almost regretted not doing something I thought I would regret if I did it….

Sound confusing, I'll explain.

Sex. For anyone who has grown up in a Christian home, in a Christian background, you would know that the world is taught that you save sex for "someone you love," but the bible says to save sex for marriage.

I have always gone by the bible, and what it says is best for my life. I tell my boyfriend to never have a condom on him, so even if we are tempted to "do the deed" we can't because we don't want to risk pregnancy.

To say that would put a little stress on our relationship would be an understatement!

So to be accountable for each other and not let a moment of weakness control our decisions, we don't make it a possibility. It sucks knowing we have to wait, but we just tell ourselves that it will be worth it when we are married. Even if that takes forever… hopefully time will fly.

So while we don't make sex an option, the world looks at us and asks why. I remember one time, one of my friends telling me, "I don't regret losing my virginity to him. I did love him and that's all that matters." I remember thinking to myself, "how could someone ever be happy with that? They gave that person everything just to not have them anymore. That's like buying a house with the last of your money, paying for it and then the last owner never giving you the keys…"

I'm sure that's not the way buying a house can legally go - school never teaches you those things - but that's what it would be like, and I didn't understand how someone could be okay with that kind of thinking.

Until a couple of weeks ago.

My problem in any type of relationship is I understand, I over understand sometimes and it leads me to forgiving people I probably shouldn't forgive. So when my relationship was on the line, and I was sure that it was over, that's when I understood why my friend was so okay with losing her virginity to someone she loves, even though she didn't have him anymore.

When I thought it was over for good this time, I looked at our relationship. He is the only person I have ever kissed willingly, he is the only person who has ever "turned me on," and he is also the only person in the world that has seen the "sexual" side of me, and that's good. I want it to stay that way.

My whole goal this time in the relationship was that with everything I do or say, I want it to show how much I love him. Sometimes I can't handle how much I love him, and the number one act the world uses to show that they love someone, I never did.

I started thinking that I could show him, by getting him a drink, or helping him with his chores. Staying on the phone with him when he drives home late at night just to keep him from falling asleep, but the ultimate act, other than dying for him, I never gave to him.

I wanted him to know that I love him, and I could never bring myself to show him. I hated that I felt that way. For a day I regretted not saying yes to sex.

That's how I got to this post today. I started thinking that if everyone lived their life with this am-I-going-to-regret-this-when-I-am-older attitude, where would it lead them?

After our relationship was fine, it took me a couple days to actually get my head on straight again. It's a good thing I am an hour away from him, because if we would have had the chance, I'm sure I might have slipped one of those nights.

Once I started thinking straight, I realized that it's not that I would have regretted having sex with Tyler. It's the fact that I had waited so many years knowing I had to save sex for marriage, just to give up before I got to the end. I wouldn't have regretted WHO it was with, I would have regretted giving up after so long.

It would have been like deciding that you are going to the olympics. So you train your whole life, spend hours upon hours in the gym, gymnastics is the only thing you know. Just to get to the Olympic Meet day and walk away, not looking back. You wouldn't regret the gymnastics, it made you strong and the person you are today, you would have regretted giving up when you were literally eight routines away from the podium.

Another thing I would have regretted was that he is not my husband… and after many conversations with people who have lost their virginity outside of marriage, I want to wait.

So I realized that while I am making decisions in my life, it is good to have that, "am I going to regret this" attitude, but you also can't live by the emotions you feel while you are making that decision. I wanted so desperately to show Tyler how much I love him, I would have done anything at that point to keep him, and I'm sure if I would have asked myself that question, "would I regret this?" I would have been struggling with the answer all night.

So if you are trying to make a big decision do a few things first.

1.) Ask yourself if you would regret what you are about to do. If you think answer is no, move on to number two.

2.) Take a few days… or hours… get rid of the emotions and let yourself think clearly about the situation.

3.) Talk to people who know you the best about the decision.

-A few days before Christmas, I sat down with my best friend's aunt and she reaffirmed that I would have regretted having sex before marriage. I don't know if she would have agreed with not regretting who, but regretting giving up, but she did agree that in the end I would regret something.

4.) Pray about it… maybe you don't believe in God. Even then, what does it hurt?

-A lot of times, I think that God knows I would make a stupid and irrational decision if he didn't help me out. I almost gave up a full ride to go to college with my cousin. I didn't end up getting into her college. At the time I was disappointed, but I think God was just looking out for me. Turns out, what would have been my only friend at Miami University, isn't even my friend anymore. She hasn't talked to me since July 12, 2013. Imagine how much it would suck had I made the wrong choice.

5.) Lastly, just get into the word. As in the bible. Look up what it has to say about it your decisions. Something as simple as sex is in there, but when it comes to college, it may not say, "don't go to Miami, you will lose your best friend…" but it might give you perspective on what is going on!

If you have all of these, then make your decision, but remember what I said about what I would have regretted. It's not that I would have regretted the sex, or who I had it with. I would have been disappointed in myself. So look at every single thing that you could possibly regret, any doubts and do those five things. I promise, you won't regret at least thinking about it for the time being!

Until Next Time!
-Bec

Hidden Motivation: A Sub-Plot

Something I have learned over the years with writing is that the inspiration has to come from somewhere. Whether its for something so simple as a blog post, or something like a book or short story. The idea sparked because of an image, a word or phrase, a life experience maybe even a song.

There are simple things you question when getting inspiration, like why would someone stand up at a wedding? The song says she was uninvited, so that must mean she was originally invited. What happened? What line was crossed?

Do you see where I am coming from?

When I think about all the small pieces of inspiration that I have while writing a story or blog post I can't help but think that they come from all over. The people I meet, the experiences I have and so on.

Something I have also learned is quite simple, there is also motivation in almost everything you do.

You look at your phone, because you want a text from someone or are expecting one.

I'm writing this post, because I need to get my thoughts out.

I do gymnastics to escape, get my mind off of things, make new friends…

There is always motivation and inspiration!

So where am I going with this?

My mom and I were talking the other day, and I told her that the truth had to come out, and she knew exactly what I was talking about. My book.

My book is something that has always been an idea, but I could never get it out just right. I knew what I wanted to write about, but I didn't know where to start or where to finish. It was confusing!

Until my senior year hit. Something happened that changed my life, turned my world upside down.

Tyler

For those of you who don't know Tyler is my first serious boyfriend, first kiss, first love and so on. Up until this point he is my only and last, and if we get married, he will end up being my first everything. So what makes him so special?

He's where it starts. He's my inspiration. I realized that I could literally start the story with when we met, and end it at our break up back in February.

For a while though, I really didn't have a reason to write it. I mean the break-up lasted for two months and so I got a good forty pages into the story…

And then we got back together.

I no longer had the urge to get it all out in words so that somebody would know how amazing it was to fall in love with someone like him at the age of 17 in a situation like mine. I had no more motivation!

But then it happened… the biggest betrayal of all. The thing that makes the story suddenly all the more interesting!

Things always have a cause and effect, and that is something to keep in mind.

So when I was telling my mom that the truth had to come out, I realized where I was getting my motivation from. If the truth came out in my book, the betrayer would know that I'm not really her friend, I only act like it because we are related, and the person I lost… well they would know the truth behind all the lies that piled up over the summer.

I had my inspiration, ultimately it was Tyler. Telling a love story…

However, the motivation is usually hidden just like so many sub-plots. Only in the end do the sub-plots come out. Like in The Hunger Games, why President Snow always smells like blood and roses, or why Haymitch is always getting wasted. Their motivation is hidden until later in the story, and I didn't realize it but so was mine.

My motivation was suddenly clear. I wanted to get the truth out, and through a large sub-plot that nobody sees coming.

I always wanted to write a great book that should be taught or discussed in schools, because of the questions that arise from it. Were the odds really in Peeta's favor? *spoiler alert* he gets the girl… if it weren't for The Hunger Games he wouldn't. I want people to question my books like I question The Hunger Games.

I want people to wonder if the person I lost, ever was really my friend. I want people to question the sanity of the person who betrayed me. What does she care about? Does she have a multiple personality disorder? Or is it all for show?

Getting the truth out, I realized at that point, was the reason I wanted to write the books. People have to know what a great friendship is like. What a horrible situation can do to a family, how heartbreaking it is when your hero breaks up with you and leaves you to fend for yourself knowing what you're going through. When your worst enemy pushes you over the edge setting her devious plan into motion and eventually stealing one of the things you held most dear to you.

So in that being said. My inspiration is simple, the main idea of my story. My motivation is a hidden sub-plot that changes the whole course of the series.

So next time you write, or blog… take a moment to think about where your inspiration is coming from.

Sure you may be thinking about your boyfriend when you are writing the piece about a girl who loves a guy, but you know that he is going to break the girls heart so you describe him as the last guy that broke your heart. However, until the point where they break up, you describe his words, his actions, his voice about the guy you currently love.

And not until you are completely done writing, until it's turned into the the teacher, or editor or submitted as a blog post to be read a year later, do you realize that you described two different people and your inspiration was your boyfriend at the time, but your motivation was the last time your heart was broken…

What's your motivation?

When you show love to a homeless person, is it because you are feeling bad, or because you have decided to show God's love?

When you give grace or forgiveness to someone, is it because they deserve it? Or because we show God's love and mercy through our own actions?

When I told my mom, that I wanted to get the truth out, I meant about our lives, the betrayal, the good and the bad, but I also want to get Jesus out.

That truth.

I want the world to know what he has brought us through and the blessings that have been in our lives and that are still to come!

So I will ask again, what is your motivation?

Home Sweet Home

Hey guys!

So I was really wanting to write a post tonight. I'm sitting here full of emotions and really didn't know how to express them properly until I was reading over one of my older posts about the EMU Gymnastics Club.

It's no secret that gymnastics is one of the many ways that I have been able to cope with everything that has gone wrong in my life. My first big break up between Tyler and I, I spent the day in the gym taking out frustrations on the mats. I didn't even think about crying until I got home late that night. By then my friends had already called him and yelled at him. The point was, the gym was a good way to cope.

Many times when there was stressful situations going on at home, I would go to the gym and take whatever beating the coaches decided to put our bodies through that day. I often explain it as the equivalent of what cutting yourself does, but instead of producing pain that could risk your life, you are producing pain that ultimately makes you stronger.

So many times already while here at Eastern, I have really been thankful for having a gymnastics club because often times it was a good way to get away from the rest of the group. It was nice to make friends and share stories about what else was going on around campus, with people who often times feel the same way you do.

So here's a story: 

Over thanksgiving break I had a great time, don't get me wrong. The problem was I was never happy, it's like I came back to Eastern wondering if I will ever be happy where I am at.
This is how I realized the horrible circle went:

When I'm at Eastern - I want to be home
When I'm at Home - I Want to be with; Chloe, Sophia, Tyler or at Eastern
When I'm with Chloe and Sophia - I want to be spending time with Tyler
When I'm with Tyler - I'm wondering if I should be spending time with Chloe and Sophia

Then it hit me, there are only two things I know for sure about this. When I'm at the gym, I want to be at the gym. When I'm home, I don't want to be home.

I never want to be home!

The only reason I want to go home is to be back in Perrysburg, where everything is familiar, and it feels like I still have a the life that I so quickly left behind and forgot about. A life that seems millions of miles away.

But too quickly that feeling of familiarity and normalcy disappeared and I was back on the road to Eastern. I was very conflicted on the drive back up here.

You see I spent Thanksgiving day with my family and the other half with Tyler's family. We went black Friday shopping on Thursday then went and saw Catching Fire (which I admit was my second time, but it was a phenomenal movie!). As Tyler dropped me back off at home, he disappointed me a little bit, but he said "we have the rest of break..." I said okay, and we moved on. He asked me about black Friday shopping, I told him the plans and he told me he would meet up with me. As I got out of the car he said "Goodbye, I love you and See you tomorrow."

This was perfect!

I was going to get to hang out with Chloe, Sophia and Tyler, and not have to worry about ditching one for the other!

However, Friday came and no response.

Saturday... after about three texts alone plus the other... six from Friday he finally texted me that we couldn't hang out on Saturday.

Sunday - no response.

I went to life groups upset, thinking that he was purposefully ignoring that text so that he didn't have to go. Then I came back to college upset about that.

Finally when Monday rolled around, I waited for the before work text - nothing.

The first break text (during practice) - nothing.

I sat in the gym doing nothing and being upset. Nothing was going right, I wasn't making anything so I went into the bathroom, cried a little bit, but my friends made me feel better. The gym was the only place I wanted to be even though it hurt to do everything and I didn't feel like doing any work at all. I just sat there and at that moment, I don't think I would have been any happier any place else. Not even with Tyler at that point because I was just so furious with him.

I ended up sending him the "we need to talk" text and waited for his second break. Conveniently I missed both of his calls while I was out with Katie and Mason. By the time I realized he had called, it was too late, we wouldn't have had time to talk so I waited for his last break.

Finally, I was able to talk to him. I will mention some of the things that kind of put me on the edge, but we ended up talking it out. I was still mad, but not as mad. I ended up telling him between that phone call and Wednesday night what I do expect out of the relationship and this time if he tries to break up with me, I'm not just walking away like I did last time. I will show up at his house to discuss it, if I have too. We then had a fun argument about who loved each other more, and that was the last time I heard about him.

Thursday classes rolled around, no before work text.

First break - No text...
Second Break - No text...
Third Break - No text...
COMPLETE SILENCE...

I thought, "maybe he left his phone at home..." so I texted him and waited until the time he got home. NOTHING.

Friday practice rolls around... no text. So I initiate the conversation... NOTHING.

I decided not to think about it. I was at the gym, working on a new skill so I put all of my time, thoughts, and energy into getting my new double salto pass on floor. I started on the tumble strip that went into the padded pit and worked my way onto the floor. I was getting frustrated, then when I thought about Tyler I would get even more frustrated.

I knew I could do this skill, I just needed to... DO IT!

So I thought, what if I set it up on floor, the same way I have it set up on the tumble strip into the pit? So I set that up and finally did one! I didn't land on my feet, I had never landed on my feet, not even into the pit, but it was a start. I told Katie that I did it, and she took out my phone and recorded the next one.

This is what we got!

http://instagram.com/p/hmZ9dbTVuh/

(I'll post the actual video later...)

For a moment, I was thrilled, excited, so... Happy!

Then I went on bars and started catching the release that I need, consistently!

It was all going great until nine o'clock rolled around and nothing came from my phone except my mother texting me about the gymnastics meet on Sunday.

Now, it's Saturday and I have yet again sent the "we need to talk" text. I still have not gotten a response, but when I do, I don't think it's going to be pretty.

The point of this post is that I was looking for a way to write all my frustrations out. To put them into a story, because that's what I do. Maybe, sit here and cry for a little bit. Let myself get everything out, but I always go back to that video and think of that moment when I landed on my feet for the very first time.

I can't help but wish that sometimes I could just hang out in the gym. I wish I could be there right now, because no matter how much I try to run from the gym I always go back to it. It's a place of sanity, and accomplishment. Some place where you can cry, make new friends, look god-awful and still have the people who see you like that love you. It's a place of pain, and torture, injury and sacrifice, but no matter how much you hate it, you always come back.

The fact is that even if you show up but don't do anything, the atmosphere is so refreshing and comforting. It can even be relaxing sometimes. You may not like it, but if you are a gymnast, you can't deny...

The gym isn't just the gym.

It's home.

Thanks For Reading!
-Bec

Giving Thanks!

So as Thanksgiving is getting closer and closer, that means that campus is shutting down, college students are heading to their separate homes to spend the rest of the week until next Monday when classes resume.

For many this could be a good thing or a bad thing. Some students wanted nothing more than to get out. Others thought they wanted out, but realized they can't stand being away from home, college wasn't what they had expected.

So what am I doing????

I am waiting for my mom and sister to arrive within the next thirty minutes. I began thinking about Thanksgiving, of course...

So in that, I want to mention everything that I am thankful for... Well, more people than anything, but I am thankful that my college is provided. I am thankful that I have a great friend who sends me this picture... and through the rotation... ends up being my desktop for five minutes...

This makes my day... every time. Thanks Chloe! 

Anyway, I am thankful for the amazing group of people that God has surrounded me with. The gymnastics team is at the top of that list. They are so encouraging and totally believe in me. They are great friends and I just can't wait to start traveling and competing with them for meets! 

These are the freshman of the team... including me! :)

Then I am thankful for my three very best friends, Chloe, Sophia and Ellie... They have been there through everything. The last night all three of us were together, Tyler and I were having a rough time in our relationship and when we sat down and prayed together I prayed for him. I stared crying and couldn't finish it, so Chloe finished it for me... I love these girls, and I don't know what I would do without them.

The last day we spent together out on the lake! I'm about to see them for the first time in months... All four of us will be together!

Of the big things that I am thankful for, there is one last thing that I am thankful for... 

Although we may argue, and believe the same things... but different things... I love him to death and I don't know what I would do without him. He has taken me home multipule times, come to visit me even more than that. He texts me every day, calls me when he needs someone to talk to... one time he called me at one in the morning and we talked for over an hour. Just talking that is it. He has turned into an incredible young man, and I can't wait to see what God has in store for him. Tyler... personally, I am so thankful for you, and even if I can't spend thanksgiving with you and your family (even though they are practically family.) I love you and I am so thankful that God has put you in my life!

For those of you that I have mentioned, I love you all so much! And seriously thanks for everything

Have a fantastic Thanksgiving everyone, eat lots of turkey, don't regret it until the next day!

Until Next Time!

-Bec

"Preach The Gospel At All Times..."

"Preach the gospel at all times, if necessary, use words..."

This phrase was the phrase on the back of a Teen Bible Quiz sweatshirt my sophomore year. I thought it was a good phrase, never really understood it until a couple of days ago.

About a week ago, my boyfriend and I had an argument about the same thing that we argue about. The only thing we argue about, religion. For the record, he is saved, but he thinks that what he believes is "mormonism." The only problem is I know more about his "religion" then he knows about Mormonism and Christianity combined. So when I say something in a conversation with him like "we argued about whether or not satan and Jesus are brothers" he says, "well the answer is obvious, no they aren't." So I reply, "really? cause mormons believe that they are..." so he says, "well maybe they are..."

See the problem? He doesn't know.

For a while I felt like his complete salvation was on my shoulders, as if I was plan A and there is no plan B. That may be the case, so I should not live my life as if there is a plan B, but that doesn't mean that whether or not he believes the right theology is on my shoulders.

You see for the longest time I was trying to show God's love, but when I get anxious and want to speed God up a bit, I present my case to him with logic and he just backs out because he can't defend himself.

You see in this rare argument that we had a couple of weeks ago, he told me that he's never coming to my church, he's never gonna be a Christian. I told him, I'm not asking him too - because that is something God has to do inside of him... not something I can just simply ask Tyler for. His response was something like "good because I'm not..." and I put down the phone and stopped listening.

I was really upset by our conversation. Which became obvious as we said "goodbye and I love you." He did apologize the next day, but it made our conversations silent and full of tension.

Two days after the argument, my best friend Chloe texted me and asked me what was up. I told her what had happened, and after stating my case, telling her that breaking up isn't an option. She told me that I can't think of his complete salvation and change in theology as something that is completely up to me. God has to do that work in him!

Lastly, she ended with... "remember, 'Preach the Gospel at all times, if necessary, use words...'"

That hit me right between the eyes!

My very goal, entering the relationship was to show him God's love and by that, I watched him slowly change into the amazing man he has become. However, I started bombarding him with facts when I started to get impatient - which is all the time now a days.

The whole "I'm right and you're wrong" strategy doesn't go well with someone when you are trying to get them to change their mind about something they themselves don't know much about.

That phrase that she gave me, reminded me how I thought I was going to handle the situation in the beginning. Pray for him, show him love... let my life show God's love, and show that he is working through me.

When I abandoned that, I abandoned all progress that I was making!

So I know I am only a freshman in college, but here's my advice for anyone who is praying for a non-believer... or believer, but their theology is skewed...

Preach the gospel at all times!

Then... ONLY if it's NECESSARY...

Use your words...

-Bec

Expectations Vs. Reality

To all of those who happen to be reading all of these, or maybe it's just me... I know I said I would introduce Andrew and Ray next, and I will in the next blog, but college has already taken some interesting turns and I had one just a few moments ago.

I had just called my mom because I was curious about how to measure the length of my arm... don't ask, it was for gymnastics. Anyway, she didn't answer, so I moved on and tried it myself, hoping that I was doing it right. Soon after my sister calls back on the home phone (yes, people still have those!) and asks what I want. I told her that I wanted to talk to mom about gymnastics stuff, she apologizes for not answering before, she says she was on the phone with her councilor then she hands the phone off to mom.

It was just a typical conversation about gymnastics meets, and how we would get to the different colleges for these meets. Then she asked me if I was excited to compete at Miami University, my answer was not so enthusiastic. I was best friends, and cousins, with this girl:

(I'm on the left, she's on the right...)

Stephanie I grew up together, I got passed through car windows to be able to stay at her house for a "play date" when we were younger. We rarely fought, only when we shared a room one time when we were younger. Our history dates back to the day I was born. This is a type of friendship I was born into, and I was not one to complain. She was my best friend, as in future brides maid at my wedding, she would have even beat out Chloe... who is my very best friend (that I'm not related to) for the position. 

Anyway, she now goes to Miami. Last year when I was still a senior, she came back and gave me advice, told me I would love college. When she came back over the summer, I saw her exactly one time, at my brothers birthday party. We talked, and it was nice. At the time my sister, Bethany, was living with her family. 

Quickly into the summer, we realized that Bethany's main goal was to do whatever it took to keep living with Aunt Pam and Uncle Andy. That included spreading any lies possible. Next thing I knew, Stephanie was not talking to me, answering my messages, calls or snap chats. She didn't even say hi when I walked into her house. I figured she would get over it, but a couple weeks into college, I go to creep on her and we aren't even friends on Facebook. That was it. 

So, back to the phone call one of our meets is at Miami, so my mother had asked if I was excited about the gymnastics meet that was going to be held there. Like I said I was hesitant with my answer and not as enthusiastic as I should be. I told my mom that if she was ever a real friend, and she heard about the gymnastics meet, that she wouldn't just skip it. I think she would still show up to see if I was competing. She responded, "Well Andy..." 

That's when my brother interrupted. My mom told him to go, but I heard him say that someone was at the door. "Hold on," she said and I listened intently as she arrived at the door. It was a woman, "is Bethany here?" 

"Yes, and why are you asking?"

"Because, we got a message saying that Bethany was wanting to hurt herself..." 

Beep, Beep Beep...

I'm still waiting for the call back. 

This was things I was going through all of senior year. Bethany always said that everything was always about me, but when I look back at my home life during my senior year the only thing I remember is Bethany DRAMA. Threats to kill herself, threatening to run away, Bethany getting into trouble, Bethany calling the cops. Even now when I may actually find out what was going on with Stephanie, and why she isn't talking to me... it's about Bethany. 

For anyone reading this who actually knows my family, it hasn't been easy. I love my sister to death, but I honestly don't know what to think about her. As far as I'm concerned she made my best friend hate me, turned my favorite Aunt and Uncle against my whole family. Tore the Garber generation apart, we aren't even meeting for Thanksgiving. She doesn't see the damage that she is doing, or has done. Please pray for her. 

In the meantime, I will continue to discover all these little things that pop up when you leave for college and start a life on your own. It's not going to be easy, and many more important calls are probably going to be interrupted because of her. One day she will see the damage, and regret all that has happened, but I'm not going to be the one to hold it against her. 

Romans 5:8

"But God demonstrates his own love for us. In this, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

I have to show that same kind of love to her, because when she realizes what she has done, she is going to hate that she did it, and it is going to be punishment enough. 

Long story short... for all those seniors out there who only want to get away from the family. Leave and never go back, I was one of them. I was ready to leave and never speak to anyone in my family again. Especially after all that drama. Maybe there was a few, Aunt Vicki... Grandpa... but other than that I was ready to try to figure out summers of living on my own, save money for a car, teach myself maneuverability to get my license. I was ready, but no matter how ready you are, you still call home when an odd rash shows up on your legs. You still call home when you don't know why you can't schedule your second semester schedule, you still call home, asking to come home. Even if it is to see your best friend or boyfriend and not your family. So to those seniors who think they are going to go to college and "escape..."

Just a warning...

It never happens! 

And that was today's life lesson...

Until Next Time!

-Bec

Eastern Michigan Club Gymnastics Team!

The first Wednesday was our first gymnastics practice for club gymnastics here at EMU. So I slipped into a leotard for the first time since June, packed my duffle bag and marched over to Warner Gym C. I walked into about 50 strangers who were either stretching, or sitting around awkwardly.

So I set my stuff down, filled out a waiver form and started stretching. Shannon, who is the captain of the club, and one of my favorite people here at Eastern Michigan personally, sat us down in a circle. She made everyone tell their year, how long they have been doing gymnastics, and one interesting fact about them. Knowing Shannon was the captain, I made her my personal goal to become friends with her. Confession - I do that to a lot of people if I walk into a big group, I narrow down the people I want to be my friend, but Shannon was a good choice because she has turned out to be someone I look forward to practicing with all the time.

So I started out on bars because there were many new-timers on floor. While chalking up for the event, I asked Shannon questions, and told her about wanting a lot of people to leave. No offense to them, but I really needed to practice and a lot of them were in my way. She told me that they would clear out in a couple of weeks.

And she was right! The gym cleared out and it became a place to relieve stress. Even if I wasn't feeling well, it's a great place to come and nap, or even do homework.

The club team has become such an amazing group that I look forward to being with every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Quickly into the practices I started talking to Katie, who has now become - I would say - my best friend here on campus. Then there is Mason, the way we became friends was... interesting to say the least...

One day I noticed he was on twitter. So when I had no way of finding him on Facebook because I didn't know his last name, I went to twitter and typed in Mason #EMU and up popped his twitter account. That's how I found out his last name, so I went on Facebook and searched his full name and sent him a friend request. That first Friday, he messaged me and said:

I thought that was so sweet and thoughtful. Soon enough, Mason, Katie and I became pretty good friends. We started practicing together, and cheering each other on with new skills. There is no coach, so often times we would tell each other where we are messing up. The best part was, we started eating dinner together after practices. It was really nice to have someone different to hang out with other than group 72 all the time!

But that was how the EMU Gymnastics Club became a home away from home, and a great group of people to hang around with.

Next, I'm going to introduce Andrew and Ray, and how we came to know those two. 

Until Then, 

Bec

Group 72

The first four days of orientation we were marched around campus, getting tours, eating horrible lunches, and playing games with the orientation group. Mine was group 72.

Group 72 was comprised of “Computer Cody” who is the know-it-all of the entire group and decided from the beginning that we were the only friends he would make in college. Little did he know, we wouldn’t necessarily all stick around.

Next is Ben, who is the athlete, always exercises and drinking protein shakes. He’s actually a really sweet guy, kind of shy and his eyes water a lot. He is roommates with Evan, who is really quiet, but funny. He doesn’t say much in the beginning, but still enjoyed hanging out with the group. He reads a lot of American novels, they are both quiet, and so they make a really good pair.

Then there is Lee; he’s the flamboyant guy in the group, does forensic with the speech team. The first few days, he was one of my favorite guys. He was great to talk to, and he carried one of those old thin phones that rotated open. He always talked about how he dropped it all the time, threw it against the wall and dropped it in puddles and it still won’t break. One of the days, he found a spider living under the bracelet we had to wear during orientation to be able to eat.

His roommate is Martese, this short little black guy who is quiet, but loves to rap. He’s great to talk to because he keeps all of your secrets, even if they are with someone who would come off as his best friend. He’s really smart, but make makes stupid decisions sometimes.

Josh is another one, he’s the guy who insults you, but you laugh about it. The first couple days in, we saw him smoking and it came as a shock…. But now he’s one of those guys that go out every night. You often wonder where he gets the money from… and your answer will never come. But don’t let his look deceive you, the only reason he is at Eastern is because he got a really good scholarship opportunity because he is actually really smart, but doesn’t care about homework. I suspect he got a really good grade on an ACT or SAT, and therefore qualified for a great scholarship, especially if his homework habits now, are the same as they were in high school.

His roommate is Kevin, we actually just met this Kevin. Come to find out, he’s in my math class, but the whole joke was that on move in day, Josh left the room to get more of his things, and when he came back, Kevin was completely moved in and already gone. He was a complete ghost. He didn’t see any sign of Kevin until a few weeks later when he came back to the room and Kevin’s laptop had been moved. Kevin wasn’t really a part of “Group 72,” but the Kevin story is funny, so I had to put it in here.

Finally we are getting to the girls. Paiton and Lizzy are roommates, both redheads. They didn’t stick around very long to play the games with us, but they were still cool and we still talk to them. 

Tatyana is one of my closest friends in the group. She is tall, black (for lack of better terms?) and really funny. She came to our group later into orientation, at first it was awkward because we were talking but I couldn’t remember her name, but quickly she became a good friend. Her roommate is Marissa, who is going deaf in one of her ears, and has a medical condition that is really rare. She’s really cool to be around, but Tatyana always talks about how she leaves her side of the room a mess and because she’s partially deaf she has her alarms set loud and early, but she never gets up for them. Talk about roommate problems.

Then there is Bailee and I; we sort of knew each other from before. We have a mutual friend, my cousin Stephanie. One day during senior year, I was on my way to English class and I get a snap chat from Stephanie saying that Bailee wants to be my roommate. I say, “That’s great! Who’s Bailee!?” That’s how it started. We ended up meeting up at Panera and trying to get a good idea of what it’s going be like. I even warned her about my mother, grandmother and all the college mayhem that I was experiencing between the both of them.

Lastly, there was our fearless leader. Active Andrew Wentz, he was outgoing and great to be around, he broke most of us out of our shell and made us become friends. Because of him bringing the group together, that made college seem like a dream come true.

I loved college, and in matter of a fact, the weekend after move-in day I ended up going home for long enough to sleep, go to church, realize why I wanted to get out of the house and leave again. I realized Eastern was a dream come true, and I asked my parents to get me back to their house, so Tyler could come pick me up and take me home, to Eastern.

But that was and still is group 72! 

This was Lee, during orientation we were playing group bonding games. Lee said he just wanted to lay down, so he laid in the grass, until he realized that it was actually wet... Oops haha

One of the first nights together, we went and saw The Hunger Games together. This was the campus at night. It's so pretty... or at least it was... now it's cold and rough.  

One of the lounges on the second floor I believe. Ben is the one under the T.V. I'm to the right, then there is Josh, Martese, Evan Tatyana and Bailee. Picture credit goes to Cody.

Playing cards in the main lounge. Bailee is look at the camera... 

After The Hunger Games. Selfie Sunday? Our first Sunday there... :)

Move In Day

My college fun started as most students at Eastern Michigan’s did, especially if they were incoming freshman. It started with move in day, we packed up the tiny red car, and as Tyler arrived I greeted him in the driveway, and he went to McDonalds for a morning snack – how typical of him

He arrived back about ten minutes later in his funny looking car; we packed the last few things in it.  We actually ended up waiting for his mother to come grab some things out of his car before we left. I said goodbye to his mom, and the pets and hopped in the car with Tyler as we began the beginning of my college career.

We didn’t really talk about much, knowing what was coming up. We jammed to the radio and I kept him awake because I knew that he was tired. I’m pretty sure we weren’t ready to say goodbye to each other, but we knew that it was best for our future.

When we got to Best Hall we finally pulled in, parked and I had to get into a line to sign a waiver, get my room keys and pick up common orientation things like the schedule for the next couple of days, maps of the campus and other fun things.

Once we had the room keys, I called my parents and gave them the okay to start bringing things in. After unpacking, getting lost on campus, and lunch, getting separated, miss communications, and a long boring speech I was forced to leave down a mysterious hallway onto the football field to meet a ton of strangers.

Group seventy-two… those are the people that you first meet on campus. This very outgoing guy, Active Andrew greeted us. He was dressed in green and white; he carried a huge homemade sign on the end of a stick. Green and white tie-dyed socks went up to his knees, he wore a green sweat band around his head and had those lines on his face right on his cheek bones. He was full of “school spirit.”

We did the usual, learned everyone’s names, played some games and then after that we went to have dinner together. That is when we all gave Active Andrew our phone numbers. I had just been able to get my first cell phone not even fifteen days before orientation, so I was still trying to figure out how to work my iPhone.

After dinner group 72 separated and I went to find Tyler. Apparently we are not good at communicating locations. Eventually I found him and my parents to watch the football game. I think we actually won that game, which is a surprise, our team actually kind of sucks.

Either way, I had been worried about being separated from Tyler. We had gone from seeing each other every day at school, to seeing each other once a week or maybe a little more than that. Now… we may go months without seeing each other. I didn’t know if we could make it, but the game definitely helped with my worries.

You know those couples that single people look at and want to vomit? That was us, and I’m pretty sure you don’t want to know all of the details, but it was great knowing that no matter how long it had been since I had seen him, he would remain my best friend.

During the game, we decided that there were still some things that needed to be taken care of, so we left early. While my parents went out to pick up some last minute necessities, Tyler and I went up to the room to have some fun for the last time for who knows how long.

That was when Bailee, my roommate walked in, after that we decided to make sure we notified the other if we were in the room alone with a guy. It’s not that we were doing anything sketchy; it’s just something she doesn’t want to walk in on. So I texted her telling her that it was okay to come back, because we were back to work anyway on putting our room together.

A couple hours passed by and it was time to say goodbye. I walked my parents out and said goodbye to them individually. I had been dying to get out for at least the last 6-7 years and that moment of saying goodbye, this day, made it all official. I was out, I was finally free.

Tyler’s turn was next. I walked over to the car with him and gave him a hug. “Don’t become a stranger…” he laughed, and promised he wouldn’t. “We can do this… and I will see you soon.” He nodded. What more was there to say? That this wasn’t going to be easy, we knew that. Were we supposed to say vows that nothing would happen, no arguments would arise that we would always talk about our problems in person? It’s not that easy. All I could really say about it is, “Save faster for an iPhone so that we can face time.” He laughed and said that he was.

We said goodbye, and as I walked away and they pulled away, leaving me here at Eastern Michigan, I didn’t cry. I couldn’t cry, college was my dream and it was finally coming true. I had a great roommate, a great room with new everything, it was a great start and I couldn’t wait for the rest of the year.

Here are some photos of move in day: 

He refused to take a picture with me... He said he was too tired... So this is what I get.

Again, at the Eastern game... Go Eagles! Haha 

Our trip to Bed Bath and Beyond to pick up my room supplies... He found a chair that he really liked and he thought "we would enjoy..." that was an interesting conversation with my father... haha 

A panorama of the move in... everything isn't unpacked, but the room was surprisingly huge! haha

Thanks for reading... There's more to come!

Until then, have a great day!

-Bec